Patient "Cory H"
Total Recording Time 00:12:41
Oct. 2017 - Age 50. Came to CSH in 2012. Has been in treatment for 5 years. Current mental state is stressed, depressed, and hopeless. At the end of this recording, he closes by saying that EVERY DAY HE HATES TO WAKE UP; EVERY NIGHT BEFORE HE GOES TO BED HE PRAYS THAT GOD WILL STOP HIS HEART. He can't stand another 10, 15, or 20 years "..of this hell hole." He has been unable to advance in treatment for the past 3 years so he can go home to his family. CSH staffing shortages have created backlogs of months/years in advancing patients through the treatment processes such as polygraph testing, PPG, and assessments. "The hospital here waves this false carrot of freedom in front of us like if you follow all our guidelines you're gonna get to go home and that's a lie!" "To me it's torturous...two state evaluators stated that I was doing well but I needed to remain here until I completed the treatment program, yet the hospital isn't providing opportunities to go forward." He has had 10 different facilitators in his SOTP group over a 5 year period. A facilitator would start to advance him in the treatment process, then leave, and he would have to start the process all over again with a replacement facilitator. Juan describes waiting 32 months for a required assessment (needed to advance in treatment,) and how the Polygraph and PPG testing has a 1 year or more waiting list, and those tests only have a shelf life of 12-18 months, meaning this causes the entire treatment process to breakdown for all patients and take 10, 15, 20 years, or more. His own tests have expired, or are at risk of expiring which will put him back on the waiting list to have them redone. THIS IS A REVEALING RECORDING.
Patient "Randy L"
Total Recording Time 00:00:48
Oct. 2017 - Age 61. (Illegal Alien - Statues: Non Gratis; eligible for deportation. Citizen of Jamaica). [This man broke down and started weeping two thirds of the way through the interview as he was discussing the loss of his mother/father, and several family members during the 20 years he has been held as a civil commitment by the Department of State Hospitals.] He was sent to ASH in 1997 from prison and came to CSH in 2005. He has filed numerous legal documents to be deported which have failed (CSH for some reason has approximately 40 deportable illegal aliens who are not deported). Dougal is a born again Christian and finds his strength in God and he gives a moving and passionate interview here. He describes seeing other patients in: "devastation, loss of hope, sadness, tears, pain and people dying, and I visit them in their dying bed." He talks about: "many patients who are beaten down like puppy dogs, 70-80 men who want die, maybe more (who he has spoken to personally), some in their 30's and 40's, they are tired of this, they want to die. They say they are in hell. They say this is worse than hell." "95% of them have no faith in the treatment program." He says nobody wants to go into treatment for 10, 15, 20 years. He had had 15 personal/close friends die which would have crushed/destroyed him if he did not have God in his life. Further, he describes being personally acquainted with 50 - 60 men who have died at the hospital (men he ate with, prayed with, and spent time with). He also says: "They killed my mom and dad with the worry and the stress! For years they want to see me and they couldn't see me and my mom told me she gonna die and she not gonna see me (breaks down weeping)..." He goes on to describe tearfully and weeping how he has lost his father, uncles, his grandmother, and aunts. Finally, he describes the Office of Patients Rights' as doing nothing, "they don't fight for us. I had valley fever and asked for help."
Oct. 2017 - Age 53. Spent 8 years at ASH. Came to CSH in 2006. Has spent a total of 15 years in treatment programs. Is married to another patient (x15 years, Richard C). Steve was recently notified that he has malignant kidney cancer and states that he has no hope for getting out. He and his partner have dropped out of treatment ("taking a break," Steve says, out of frustration). He describes getting new facilitators every 6 months who make you redo previous work, or "they need to get to know you." He also describes how group time is wasted where in a 2 hour group with 11 men they will spend an hour asking every man: "How was your weekend? (which they refer to as a "check in"). Steve says, "there is no future for us, CSH even eliminated the GED and college programs in 2011 and 2012. There are no vocational programs where you can be certified for a job in the community. He has not seen his sickly mother in over 15 years who has been hospitalized on several occasions. CSH has REFUSED to allow him, or any CSH patient to SKYPE of FACETIME with sick or dying family members, nor can sick or dying patients SKYPE or FACETIME with their families. Steve describes the hospital milieu as a hopeless environment. He states that the Office of Patients Rights' "Is a joke and does inadequate investigations." He stated that Jode Keasler , CSH Patient Rights' Advocate, "...backs the hospital all the time. She doesn't do nothing and is disgusting." He further stated that the PRA office rarely, interviews patients and backs the hospital all the time.
Patient "James H"
Total Recording Time 00:0:5:17
Patient "Robert B"
Total Recording Time 00:07:19
Sept 2017 - At 61 years of age, Jim C has been at CSH for 8 1/2 years. He is a Vietnam Vet with dozens of kills, and he suffers from very severe PTSD. He has lain in bed for his entire stay as CSH, watching TV and crocheting, hardly ever leaving his room, which is completely okay with hospital officials. He states that he wants to spend the rest of his life at CSH in his room continuing to watch TV and crocheting. He never wants to go home. He recently had a near-death experience, which has allowed him to attend meals with other patients, and get over some of his PTSD, but he is still suffering from his condition.
Sept 2017 - Donald D is 52 years old, has been at CSH for 8 years, and wishes he was dead every day. He dropped out of treatment after 5 years when he saw that nobody was being released even after 10-15 years in treatment. He is emotionally traumatized after seeing six of his friends die at CSH, and describes living in a chaotic environment of hopeless and angry men. The hospital has failed to provide adequate diet for his food allergies, so he goes hungry and begs for food from other patients.
Oct. 2017 - (#2 of 2, see Patient Recordings 1) - Age 52. This is James second recording with CSHABUSE.COM. He recently quit treatment after 20 years and accepts that he will die at CSH. His reason for this decision was that he passed a polygraph test which verified that he had no deviant fantasies. However, because he had some response in PPG testing, his psychologist Daniel Fuselier, Psy.D, mandated that he take a class where he would now be required to write fictional fantasies on paper about what he would like to do to children; to concoct scenarios in his mind. James said this would be impossible to do because he has no fantasies like this, he has never had such fantasies, and he is incapable of creating such fantasies which the polygraph has verified. In the recorded interview, James uses the analogy of someone trying to write a book on how to build a boat who has no idea how to build a boat. Furthermore, after 20 years of treatment, James confides how abhorrent the thought is for him to take his mind to such a dark place, to a place where he never wants to ever go and where he is incapable of going. He states that after 20 years in treatment it would disgust him to even attempt to write such disgusting things and this was the basis of his decision to quit treatment. CSHASBUSE.COM is aware of many patients at CSH who have been in a similar position as James describes here.
Sept 2017 - Aaron W is 56 years old and has been in treatment for 20 years, and is about ready to drop out. He has had several different facilitators who have had him repeat work previously completed. He is tormented about thoughts of suicide every day, but does not act on these thoughts because he loves his daughter and his wife.
Patient "Aaron W"
Total Recording Time 00:06:36
Sept 2017 - Randy L is 50 years old. He has been at CSH for six years, and has been in treatment the entire time. He states "Every day is mental torture for me. I believe I'm going to die here. Something has to be done. They need to create a structure within this place to give people hope again."
This section contains recordings of statements made by various CSH patients. These recordings were made over telephone conference lines and each patient gave his consent for being recorded.
This collection represents a portion of what is present in the recording archives.
Patient "Dougal S"
Total Recording Time 00:16:16
Patient "Jim C"
Total Recording Time 00:06:10
Oct. 2017 - Age 75. Came to CSH in 2008 from ASH. Suffering from lung cancer and liver cancer, left heart artery blocked, kidney disease, and probably doesn't have long to live. He said he expects to die at CSH. Has been a resident on the acute medical unit for 39 months. Participated in the ASH and CSH treatment programs for a total of approximately 11 years until he quit. He had at least a half dozen facilitators and with each change they told him his work wasn't done right "do it over again, change it up" It made him feel degraded, hopeless, and useless. The only reason he kept going is because he wanted to be free and get out of the hospital. He stated that he went through three different changes in treatment modules: PHASES, GOOD LIFE, then SOTP.. He says each time CSH changed the treatment modules, it was starting treatment all over, with "new" textbooks" and "pamphlets," AND HE FINALLY GAVE UP AFTER 11 YEARS OF HARD WORK SAYING IT WAS ALL "USELESS." On the acute medical unit, he describes seeing approximately 31 patients die, or who were taken out to die at a local hospital. He describes conditions that are nothing less that atrocities: patients left lying in feces and urine repeatedly as a matter of daily practice, patients call bells not being answered, nurses telling patients "I'm not your nurse, I'm not going to help you." He describes that staff who are assigned to acutely ill patients one-to-one always fall asleep because they work back to back overtimes. He describes a chocking incident where nobody helped the patient who died which the police investigated, but not the Office of Patients Rights'. He states that when patients die on the MA2 acute medical unit, officers seal the room, take pictures and fingerprints, then remove the body. James is emphatic that there has never been anyone to question the patients about the events leading up to, or surrounding a patients death. He states that he has only seen Daniel Wagoner, the CSH Patients Rights' Advocate on the unit twice in 39 months. He has never seen Michelle Mudgett, from Disability Rights California, and he has never seen Leslie Morrison , Director of Investigations, Disability Rights California, nor Catherina Blakemore, Disability Rights California. This is a compelling recording.
Patient "Jaun M"
Total Recording Time 00:16:55
Oct. 2017 - Age 65. Came 20 CSH in 2007. Says that CSH is a farce, a sham, and a means "to punish and incarcerate us beyond what the court imposed." Was in PHASE treatment and quit after 4 years when he could not agree on treatment goals with his facilitators and they would not allow him to change groups. States he has been accused of "staff shopping" for trying to avoid confrontations with problematic staff. States that the Office of Patients Rights' "is a joke!" States that he has filed many complaints and that they very seldom find in favor of the patient. Staff take the complaint forms and use them against you, as though you have a mental problem accusing staff of wrong doing.. Of 50 complaints he has filed, they have never found good cause in even one because staff all have close ties through marriage, or through family, or through the fact that they simply know each other in their own environment. He has NEVER seen Disability Rights California touring the facility speaking with patients. Finally, he states that when patients file complaints with the California Department of Public Health, Licensing & Certification, and they investigate those complaints, they only talk to staff, they rarely talk to the patients who filed the complaint. Then they lie in close out letters which they send to patient claiming that they spoke to them on the telephone, or on-site when they visited the facility, and that their complaint could not be substantiated. (CSHABUSE.COM has seen dozens of patients with letters like this).
Last Update: Sept 2018
Patient "James W"
Total Recording Time 00:12:19
Patient "Greg P"
Total Recording Time 00:15:37
Patient "Donald D"
Total Recording Time 00:01:48
Oct. 2017 - Age 36. Came to CSH in 2008. Has been in treatment for 9 years. Is very depressed and angry about the treatment process which he says "takes away your motivation." He describes having 9 different facilitators in a single group. He has had several different facilitators over the years. He states that in many instances, new facilitators disapprove of work assignments that previous facilitators have approved and signed off as "completed." He is only in Module 2 because of this. He further describes that there are two facilitators who run each group and they often argue with each other about how to run the group. He said across the board the facilitators don't know what they are doing and there is no consistency in the treatment program/groups, and what is expected from one patient to the next. He has seen many patients give up and drop out. Cory is a peer litigator at the hospital who other patients go to for help. He describes the Office of Patients' Rights' as "worthless...and the whole office is a sham and it doesn't do anything to help anybody." They screen out complaints, give patients form letter type responses, and don't assist illiterate patients help fill out forms; he states that he has to help patients fill out forms. Finally, he states that he has never seen Disability Rights California, specifically Michelle Mudgett, onsite doing inspections and visiting with patients on the units, nor has he heard of such visits.
Patient "Steve B"
Total Recording Time 00:13:10
Patient "Henry S"
Total Recording Time 00:06:15
Oct. 2017 - Age 59. 7 years at ASH. Came to CSH in 2005. 11 years total in treatment programs. States that treatment is a facade, deception, that you will get out someday, that you will reintegrate into the community, but that's not the reality. More of what happens is that you are stalled, stalling tactics, they don't assess you within reasonable time frames, long waiting lists for assessments, demand you assess every year, that you take plysmograph every year, the MMPI, and within 6 months of each staffing, and each time they find new reasons, or new techniques, or using the dynamic risk factors as stalling tactics. Currently in Module 3, but could face 10+ more years of treatment. Every day he is in a state of anxiety/can't sleep well; at CSH you lose your peace of mind, your spirit, your soul, you feel completely hopeless, like there is no end to it. He now takes 900 mg. of Lithium daily to stay sane. Preoccupied 24/7 that he is going to DIE at CSH. He wants the California State Legislature to realize that CSH needs a program where there is hope. He states that the Office of Patients Rights', "There is no advocacy,they work for Sacramento; they never agree with you. They lose your complaints.....prolong them 6-8 months.....it's a facade." He does not see Patients Rights Advocates intervening in much of the patient abuse in the hospital.
Sept 2017 - Age 58. Came to CSH in 2006, and was at ASH the previous 10 years. Dropped out of formal treatment after 4 years, but stayed in various treatment groups for 20 years until his treatment material was used against him in a jury trial. Says the treatment program is a scam, fake, fraud, no exit point, designed to keep you pinned down, they always manage to change facilitators so you have to start over again; "they are just holding us until we die." He is content with the fact that he is going to die at CSH and wishes he was dead. Says he can't wait to die. Hates waking up every day at CSH. His trust in the hospital is destroyed as well as his self-esteem. Says they traumatize him, they demoralize the patients, dehumanize the patients, says he feels worthless, the staff keep reminding him every day how worthless he is. He says that everybody knows they are going to die here and the environment is hostile. Says that the Office of Patients Rights' is impotent and that the executive management of Disability Rights California, Michelle Mudgett and Catherine Blakemore have never conducted a meaningful onsite visit to CSH, to meet with peer leadership groups to address the issues which CSHABUSE.COM has identified.
Patient "James W"
Total Recording Time 00:10:05
Oct. 2017 - Age 44. Came to CSH in 2007 from ASH. Was in treatment up until 2010 for a total of 13 years. He had 7 different facilitators who each criticized the work he had done with the prior facilitator and made him repeat his work which made him "pissed off" and "frustrated." He saw the same thing happening to other patients. He states that in 2010 his facilitator told him his work was all wrong without even looking at it the day before CSH transitioned from the PHASE treatment module to the GOOD LIFE module. He then decided to abandon 13 years in treatment and quit. Robert goes on to describe seeing several friends die who he was allowed to visit in CSH acute care unit on a daily basis. While visiting the acute care unit, he describes seeing patients abused and neglected which has made him an angry and bitter man. He says staff should die the same way that he saw patients suffering and dying: "alone, with tubes in their arms." He goes on to describe that he saw staff on the acute care unit ignoring patients "sitting on their asses half the time and playing games...that's what I seen over there." Finally, Robert describes the Office of Patients Rights' as ineffective and that he has been waiting 1-2 years to have a complaint resolved. His perception is that most patients ignore the Office Patients Rights' and that they side with the hospital administration.